Wednesday, June 23, 2010

A new perspective on "The Call"...

The internet has definitely been an awesome tool that God has used in my life! First and foremost, He used it to help me meet my Prince Charming! Indeed! Amen! Secondly, He has used it to connect me to people all over the United States with hearts for adoption and His precious children... even connecting us with a wonderful new family living just down the street that, honestly, we may never have met otherwise! What a sweet answer to prayer!

Today our adoption Yahoo! group was buzzing with activity! Travel dates being assigned, people passing court, and referrals! There was so much wonderful joy being shared. But the green bug of envy caught me AGAIN! Where was "our call"? "Oh my, we've been skipped over!" (Simply due to the fact that God has called all of our families to different genders/age ranges/medical conditions, etc.) "But... STILL!" (can you hear the sad whining going on.... oh dear...)

Then I recalled a sweet conversation we had with our new friends... and was reminded that we said "yes" to His calling... openly and with all our hearts... yet, nothing is absolute. His plans are His plans. His timing is His timing. I suddenly realized, the call we are waiting for is HIS!

I have found such relief in that! Yes, oh, yes, I'm still excited to hear from our awesome social worker... but now, when she calls... in reality it is God using her as an instrument of His voice and plan for our family! Sweet!

So, green bug of envy... you aren't welcome anymore! Let the joyful waiting continue...

And in the meantime.. Thank you God for this incredibly beautiful sunshine, for the amazing family you've given me, for an incredible week of Kidfest VBS (and the energy to withstand monitoring 100 or so preschoolers during recreation time!), for awesome giggle times with my kids and for new friends who love You and gently remind me of Your love!... I am so very blessed indeed!

Shani with one of our new friends... sweet Eliza!

Monday, June 7, 2010

Joyously waiting...

How's the waiting going? Well, while my intentions were wonderful... to wait peacefully as the Lord reveals His will and timing... however, my heart and mind are struggling every now and then to stay at peace.

The reason is simple... it's the realization that the sweet baby girl God intends to be a part of our family is undoutedly alive! Do we know her name? Have we seen her face? No, but God does and has and has her wrapped in His loving arms and protection even as I write this!

For those who have not been a part of the adoption community, these emotions are so hard to describe and understand. There is an expectant joy, wondering if today will be the day the call comes! With that is an indescribable ache... wondering if today or tomorrow or next week or next month will be when the call comes!

I ordered t-shirts from another adoptive family's fundraiser and received them in the mail today. I cried reading one of the "stamps" on the package... "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase." Martin Luther King Jr. That couldn't describe our journey more perfectly. We asked God when we should start our adoption process. We took the first step when we felt His calling. Though, like a spiraling staircase, we can't see the rest of the "steps" ahead of us, He knows.

Until He reveals the next "step", we wait joyously... enjoying the family He has already blessed us so abundantly with...